Gravity

Wednesday's gone.

I did a pile of stuff today, and sitting here now it still feels like I killed the day. I had an awesome class this morning, shopped, did homework, and got killed at indoor soccer. At some things I swear I'm a born loser. Like sports. I can be skilled enough and have enough experience, but I always like to play up a level at the point where I rarely win. It's humbling I guess, losing all the time. It's also a process to deal with frustration and learn to lose with class. Well, we lost 7-0 tonight with class.

I want to share something I read in class today. I've adapted a few things from other people that I've written on here, and I often don't mention it. This story was called 'the wolves within'. It struck a chord with me because I deal with hate fairly regularly, and this story addresses that. I would say that one of the most negative things about myself is the hate that I hold toward other people, and this resonates.

Hate wears you down, and doesn't affect your enemy. As a natural strategist, I would read that line and instantly realize that carrying hate is dead weight. I still to decide to keep hate inside, and I still don't mind. The story describes the two wolves inside of me. The first is good and does no harm, and only fights when necessary. The other is full of anger. He fights everyone, all the time, for no reason. Anger and hate are so strong that it can't think straight.

Both Wolves try to dominate my spirit, and it's sometimes a struggle to live with both. So which one wins, and dominates me?

The one I feed.

'We barely remember, who or what came before this precious moment'